Just don’t make a frequent habit of this - once a week is probably about right - because you can irritate your tissues if you’re constantly washing yourself out. Anal sex can present the possibility of a show-stopping mess, and many people prefer to clean themselves out with a douche (which cleans the immediate area inside your butt) or an enema (which goes deeper). If possible, you’ll want to practice a little extra hygiene as well. And talking about your fantasies can be a fun way to get in the mood! Don’t be afraid to go into detail about what you think would be fun to try, from positions to accessories to role-play. Talking about your hard limits will prevent any unpleasant surprises. To really maximize the experience, you’ll want to be sure you prepare a bit ahead of time, set some expectations, and, of course, practice vigorous consent. In other words, bottoming isn’t always easy - but there are ways to make it easier. And like any sexual encounter, communication is key to avoiding hurt feelings, not to mention physical pain.
Bottoming can expose you to certain infections and injuries if you’re not careful. But if you’re open to it and able, there’s great pleasure to be had when inviting penetration, whether you’re playing with a longtime partner, a new friend, or yourself.Īs with any position, there are some challenges to bottoming effectively. For others, it’s a no-go, whether because anal sex can sometimes be painful or unpleasant, because of the unique way their body works, or simply because they prefer other kinds of sex. For some, it’s a gateway to enormous amounts of pleasure and a way to enact deeply held fantasies. Flexible sex positions practically demand an audience-funny, since they’ll almost always only have an audience of one.Bottoming isn’t everything when it comes to queer sex, but it certainly is something. There’s something kind of incredible about being able to turn any low-key lovemaking sesh into an absolute show, via something that’s so practiced (or so innate) it’s easy. These flexible sex positions are so far outside my norm they’re almost unfathomable to me I’d love to be able to kick my leg so high I could drape it over my partner’s shoulder and ask him to penetrate me while both of us are merely standing face-to-face. What kind of person trades classic cowgirl for a sideways version that involves a full-on split? (And what kind of person does a full-on backbend just to give their partner a blowjob?)
All things considered, sex is a somewhat mundane activity the thought of doing an arabesque so deep you’re practically doing a split mid-coitus is so astounding it’s almost amusing. I think the fascination lies within the unceremoniousness of flexible sex positions-there’s something so casual about it.
(That’s not the case for all gymnastics routines, of course-I’ve been brought to tears by what Team USA has done at the Olympic Games on more than one occasion.) Because I find myself, at times, more amazed by the idea of some of these sex positions than I am by some of the gymnastics routines I’ve born witness to. Likely because there’s something captivating about extreme flexibility in general-but that’s not entirely it. There’s something weirdly captivating about sex positions that require immense amounts of flexibility. It’s a mesmerizing exercise-albeit a somewhat masochistic one, considering I can’t even touch my own toes. But that hasn’t kept me from perusing some of the most flexible sex positions (read: the sex positions requiring the most flexibility) in the zeitgeist.